I called Apple to resolve a technical difficulty. I knew exactly what I had done, was pretty sure that restoring some files would undo the damage but didn’t know which files I needed to restore. The (second) technician I spoke with directed me to the correct folder and I was up and running quickly.

Well, almost. When I logged in to my Apple Care package to figure out how to contact them, I was informed that I was entitled to some 500 days of support. If only I could figure out how to get that support!

A wonderful little online utility asked me repeatedly to identify the source of my problem and provide an explanation. After several iterations of reading irrelevant solutions, I started searching elsewhere for a phone number.

When I finally found a number I hoped would work, the recording told me it would be 15 minutes and that I should try finding my answer online.

No way! Been there! Failed at that! Please let me talk to a competent, knowledgeable resource who speaks English! 

The coup de grâce after my problem was resolved, was an email asking me to fill out a survey about Apple’s customer service. They wanted to know if I was happy with the technical guy who answered the question I already knew to ask.

They asked nothing about what had made it so hard for me to control my breathing and tone of voice when I was finally connected to a competent human being.

Ask the wrong questions and you get useless answers. If you want to provide great customer service, you need to learn about the entire customer experience.

And maybe the customer isn’t the first person to ask. If James was at all observant, I am pretty sure he detected the exasperation in my voice. I didn’t want to take it out on him. It wasn’t his fault I had just been screaming at the recording. So I told him I was doing my best to get my frustration under control. I wonder what James would say if someone asked him what percentage of customers fall into these categories: