When we began this whole Urban Experiment, we thought seriously about never owning a residence again. We thought about renting furnished apartments and being free to come and go with ease. Maybe six months in one city, three in ski country, and then a year somewhere else. We could have many urban experiments in cities here and abroad interspersed with travel and vacations. Why own a place? My work involves lots of travel and phone conversations. No reason to travel from the same place all the time!

But now, 9 months into this wonderful experiment, we still can’t get Mass Health Connector to get our address right! They aren’t the only ones, but certainly the ones that have sucked up the most time. The day we finally get all the address changes right, we’ll be ready to move again!

Nine months in, we are tired of driving over 100 miles each way to see our doctors and dentists because it doesn’t make a lot of sense to switch if we’re going to move again!

Nine months in, we’ve postponed updating our wills that have addresses that go back several houses because we’re going to move again!

Nine months in,  we can’t even decide what color to reupholster our favorite love seat because we’re going to move again!

Nine months in, we had to vote in the primary using a provisional ballot because motor-voter registration doesn’t always work. And now, we’re going to move again!

Turns out moving all the time isn’t exactly practical. We’ll have to change our voter registration, addresses, driver’s licenses, checks, car registration, and find new places to get haircuts, etc., all over again! Our goal was to simplify life, not to add boring complexity.

But pragmatism isn’t the only reason to have a “permanent” home base. (Though it is certainly sufficient!)

I’m a problem solver. Not knowing where we are living next is a problem demanding a solution. For nine months, I’ve tried to set that problem aside. Meanwhile, my husband pokes around online. He shows me pictures of a townhouse, or a town, or a lake. You think I can look briefly and get back to work? No way! That’s just not me! I want to know! I want to solve the problem! I want progress! I am not the patient sort! Thus, this journey of ours has consumed a lot of my time. I don’t want to do this every year. I want to live my life, not spend it constantly making big decisions and unnecessary decisions.

Here’s another problem, one you would probably never guess! Being in limbo makes us feel older! Why? Because when you stay in the same place, age creeps up on you and, with any luck, remains of little consequence. What’s another birthday, right?

But if you are forced to make decisions like “Should we look for another one year gig or should we find a place where we would be happy for 2, 3, or 5 years?” it is easy to start projecting even further. “After that we could …” Next thing you know, you are doing too much unpleasant arithmatic as you add various time periods to your age. “Wait, did you say 80?!?! While a little urgency is good for preventing inaction, I don’t really want to think about my age this much!

And then there is the matter of location’ “Is it important to be near skiing?” is quickly followed by “If we’re ever going to live really close to great skiing, it better be pretty darn soon!” You know what comes next, right? Not so funny sarcasm takes over. “Maybe we should find a place without stairs!” “Where’s the nearest hospital?! These are not conversations I want to have until I have to! This is one case where denial is important!

Thus, we’ve decided to purchase a home base. Get the addresses changed. Register to vote. Find new doctors and dentists. Update the legal papers. In short, settle all those practical matters.

We’ll move in and then leave whenever we want. We can still rent a place in a foreign city or the mountains for a few months. We can still take off on vacation. We can be as impulsive as we wish. But we don’t have to. We don’t have to make any big, unnecessary decisions unless we want to.

Read Part 12 of the Urban Experiment!